10 Months

I can't believe it. Our little toddler tornado has been home for nearly a year.

Where does time go?

He is doing great! I have to admit that while Will has always been beyond lively, Jack has taken lively to a whole new level. He is the definition of energy.

This child gets into everything. He climbs everything. He has little to no time to rest....naps usually last an hour if we're lucky. There are some days that the energy level catches up with him and we'll enjoy three hours of calm!

He is done sucking his thumbs. Much to his dismay. He wears socks on his hands every night and every naptime. Unfortunately, with the taking away of his thumbs he has resumed the rocking that we thought was long gone. The other night he was rocking so viciously that I thought someone was sitting in the recliner in the living room, rocking. We're not sure how to get this to stop...and are hoping that with time he'll outgrow it. I have been spending about an hour each day rocking with him in hopes of him deciding that it's more fun to rock with someone than to rock all by himself.

He still doesn't really talk. Oh, he says a few little words, but nothing like I thought he would be by now.
-Gook, Mom (look)
-Hi
-Bye
-I lo oo (I love you)
-DADDDDYYYYY!!!
-Addie
-Wi (Will)
-All du (all done)
-Mmmm-mmmm
-Wow
-Whoa
-Eeeeeekkkkk
-Uh-oh
-da ba ba be me bo (the Bible tells me so....the last line to Jesus loves me)
-yeah
-des (yes)
-dat (da..Russian for yes)
-Guck (yuck...said frequently at meal time...especially when fruit is served)
-Youch (ouch)
-Woof, woof
-Meow
-Moo
-Oink (though it sounds like he's gargling)
-Mo (no)
-Ah ga ga ga ga (which means toilet, or drink, or outside, or upstairs, or sleep, or.....)

I really don't think he sees the need to talk. All he has to do is grunt and point and his siblings rush to his aid. Why exert the extra energy?

He still sleeps in our bedroom, though I'm beyond ready for him to move on. Our problem right now is a lack of a place to move him on to. He'll sleep in Will's room and until we can get Will to sleep all night it's not really an option. (As a sidenote though, Will is doing much better. We removed all pictures, toys, etc. from his bedroom and installed a baby monitor with a camera so we can see what he does all night. The first couple nights he was still up and playing (with blankets as there were no toys) but then figured out that we do, in fact, keep a pretty close eye on the happenings in his room. His sleep habits have changed!!! Rather than coming downstairs and biting every one's heads off cause he was up all night playing with legos, he comes down with a smile. It makes a much happier little boy...and in turn makes a much happier mommy.) Anyway, we have high hopes that Jack can move on out of our bedroom sometime in the next few months. He will not be pleased with that, but too bad for him. Thankfully, he isn't in our bed...just on a mattress at the end of our bed...

He still loves animals...and they love him as well. I'll have to say for as big as our dogs are, they are super gentle with our children. If you want one....Gena is due to have her babies this week. :)

He can pout with the best of them. And stomp his feet. And lie on the floor screaming and kicking and... And scowl.

It's amazing how even a two year old can get his feelings across without being able to talk. :)

He's growing. When we took him to the doctor in October, he'd grown 1.5 inches since his August appointment. I don't know what is the 'normal' rate of growth for a child, but that's a little more than either of our other two ever did. He's currently the same height that Addie was when she was almost four. :)

He still greatly dislikes fruit. All fruit. He loves fresh and cooked veggies, bread, any kind of meat. He doesn't really care for potatoes, unless they are in the french fry form. He's a trooper when it comes to food, often eating more than I do. No wonder he's growing.

He finally is starting to like people other than just us. A couple weeks ago he allowed Grandpa to hold him and over the weekend wanted Grandpa anytime he came within arms reach. He loves Grandma...though he's always thrilled to see me if I leave him with her for a couple hours. It's nice to have him start liking other folks, but I have to admit that it was really nice to not worry about him parent shopping as his big sister did. That, my friends, is not fun. Something about having your child prefer other adults over you, the mom, just doesn't settle too well.

Overall, it's been a great 10 months. Will is finally starting to act like the little boy we had before the imposter arrived. Addie is getting over her frustration that he won't cooperate as well as she had hoped when she thought we were bringing home a baby. I'm getting used to trying to keep up with him....though it still exhausts me. Jason is getting used to having an exhausted wife. :)

We're thrilled to have him here in our lives.

Who doesn't lounge on full trash bags to eat cookies?

We're so thankful that Russia and his family allowed us to bring him into our home. We're so thankful for the blessing of adoption.

Orphans at Play Give A Grandma Gift

Tis' the season to Give a Grandma and help a child through Orphans at Play's newly released holiday donation cards. Honor that special person in your life by giving the gift of a donation in their name. Our cards give you an area where you can write up a special note and we will have them delivered to their door in time for the holidays.

You can make a difference this holiday season. The Give a Grandma Program is in place with grandma's working successfully in a baby hospital in Vladivostok. We have two grandma's ready to be placed in Nakhodka and hope to be placing more into the local homes in Vladivostok.

Thinking about what to give a co-worker, friend or relative? This is the perfect present that keeps giving all year long. A child's smile, a hug, a hand and play time are all simply worth Giving a Grandma. We work hard to bring the basic needs to children in Russia who are without families, sitting day in and day out in play cribs, rooms with several beds or cribs. Our team have all experienced the incredible gift of seeing a child's life change with just a little bit of love and contact. Our Grandma's go in and give these children ever lasting hope. Be a part of Give a Grandma and when you sit down for a large Christmas feast know that you made that bit of difference for an orphaned child.

From one of our parents, "I remember sitting there watching my son's face the day I met him staring blankly out of the window. There was a bit of awe coming about in his eyes. He looked as if he had never seen the huge tree blowing in the wind. We realized he really hadn't when we brought him out of the orphanage. In fact, he had never touched grass before. The simple things we take for granted, these children have never experienced." - MB

Orphans at Play want to bring these experiences to children and help support their needs by Giving a Grandma. Let's ring the New Year in with at least 3 Grandmas! We have a little over 3000k to raise to achieve our goals by the end of the year. We hope to raise enough funds by December 31st to bring our grandma's into homes for the 2012 year. Just take a moment and visit our Store.
Your donation is also completely tax deductible and we will be sending you a receipt with each donation.

Here is a little bit about our program in place in Vladivostok, Russia.

Grandma Mentoring Program

Children thrive with simple contact in promoting emotional growth and physical development by giving a baby home a grandma. The few orphanage employees cannot keep up with the growing number of children in these homes. This is where Orphans at Play have partnered with the vladmission.org in the Primorsky Krai region to provide the Grandma Mentoring Program giving children a chance to “play”.

The “play” time is a program built on a foundation of research and expertise in the areas of development and attachment in order for grandmas to be educated in the most effective ways to impact socioemotional development.

The advantages of this program:

* increases attachment
* lowers behavior problems
* enhances emotional growth
* strengthens physical growth
* promotes language development
* lowers stress
* promotes social skills

The grandmas are given a small monthly stipend to spend at least 48 hours in a designated orphanage each month. The stipend allows them to spend time doing something they love while providing a source of income for their personal needs. This program is active and making a difference in the few homes in place, however is in desperate need throughout the region. You can make a difference by helping support the Grandma Mentoring Program by donating now and putting a grandma to play.

****Just as a sidenote, we have three children from three different orphanages. The differences were astounding. The baby home that Addie was in was okay, but the children obviously didn't have much interaction with adults.

The baby home that Will was in was much better. They did have some folks coming to walk the children in strollers. He had obviously been outside quite a lot and had absolutely no fear of grass, etc.

The baby home that Jack was in was superb. It was a smaller home (only about 17 infants and toddlers when we brought him home) and the children obviously got much more one on one time. The caregivers loved the children.

I can only imagine how much more well adjusted these children will be if they have some time with Grandmas. Older folks who just want to have some contact with some pip-squeaks. It's a win-win. The grandmas get some 'grandchildren' and the children get to experience some time with grandmas.

We still need to raise about $3000 in order to get the grandmas into the orphanages in 2012. I know that it can be done. That's only 300 people giving $10 each.

If we can't go bring home the children, we certainly can insure that the children left behind will receive the best of care.

Blessings to you all this Christmas season.

Borsch and Blini

Last week we had the privelege of having some friends in our home for a meal. We had never met them in person, but felt as if they were long lost friends from the moment they walked in the door. They live in the far off state of Washington, and since we have never been there, and they hadn't been back here for quite a number of years...the opportunity to meet in person had simply never arose.

Gary and Denise have a little in common with our family. While they have three biological children, they also have two adopted.

One from Russia

and one from India.

It was a fun evening of discussing Russia experiences.

Along with Gary's we also had his brother and family and my parents. Grand total was 17 people...and if you know the size of our house you would know that that is nearly the max that our abode can host.

The evening wasn't without it's few mishaps.

Supper was borsch and cheddar chowder (for those who don't care for borsch), Pirozshki, sour dough bread, and, for dessert, blini with a twist. The blini was topped with a cream cheese filling, rolled up, and smothered with strawberries and cool whip. We had it that way at a restaurant in Moscow and loved it.

Anyway. Soup is not the best meal to serve company, I decided. The borsch was great, if you are a fan of borsch, which I am not. The cheddar chowder had curdly cheese for some unknown reason, but was still edible....though one whole bowl of it ended up upside down in the center of the table. Something about nerves and not paying attention to what I was doing, I suppose.

The Pirozshki was delicious if I must say so myself.

The bread was awesome...straight from the bakery at Wal-Mart.

The blini was nearly what we remembered from our breakfast in Moscow.

So the soup spilled all over the table.

Then when supper was over....the toilet ran over and I had to mop the floor. With company sitting around my table in the next room and children watching my every move. The poor little fella who had the unfortunate experience of flushing at the wrong time had tracked some....stuff....into the living room, so the mopping had to happen right beside the table.

Not one of my finer moments, I'm sure. But it was funny...and I am confident our newest in-person friends will never forget the evening!

The children thoroughly enjoyed the evening.

Addie had the chance to boss everyone around...not that they would listen.

Will caroused around making sure his company had all the toys they needed.

And Jack was once again spoiled rotten by the big kids....who always tend to tote him around whereever he wants to go.

They wound down by perching on the couch and listening to the biggest of them all read books.

It was a wonderful evening of getting to know a fellow adoptive family.

School

I can't believe that Addie has been going to school now for three months and I have yet to let you all know how it's going.

I'm sure you've been wondering.

Currently it's going great!

The first day of school started out on the wrong foot. She was nervous as a wet hen and as a result piddle-dinked around and was nearly late. She cried for her first day of school picture. Tears were streaming around her little grin.

She was terrified to go. She knew her teacher quite well...our neighbor...but still was terrified. Not sure what she thought would happen.

In her class this year are four little girls. I don't envy that teacher. Four little girls who all dearly love to be in charge. Four little girls who screech and holler with the best of them.

Two of the little girls are four years old...well, one just had a birthday and is now five and the other has a birthday in December. The third little girl is down syndrome. And then there's Addie. She's six. To be seven in April.

Since when do four year olds go to kindergarten? I was floored. While we knew that Addie most definitely needed the reinforcment of another year in kindergarten, we were extremely tempted to put her in first grade anyway. Common sense won out.

She gets a little bored. She complains of not learning anything new. But I know that it's best for her. And she is learning something. She can now say the days of the week in order. She can count a little better than she could. And most importantly, she can quote all of Psalm 100 and much of Genesis 1:1-7. We're amazed.

Three years ago we had a little girl who was so overwhelmed with life that she could barely function. She didn't learn her colors until right before we started school last fall at 5 years old. She wasn't interested in something as mundane as colors. She struggled to focus on anything for longer than 3 minutes.

And now she's able to quote seven verses from the Bible? A miracle.

After the first week of school it seemed to improve. She loved her teacher. She loved the fact that she was the oldest in the classroom...I think she thought that automatically made her in charge. She loved to learn.

And then the problems began.

Every day she starts out her day with five little fish in the fishbowl on her desk. If she keeps all five of them, she earns a 'paycheck' and a 'bonus'. If she loses one she loses her bonus. If she loses them all she loses the paycheck. (They use their 'money' to buy items from the store....pretzel rods, paper, little snacky items.

Every day she would tell us that she had a super day. Every day she informed us that she was keeping every one of her fish. Every day she would tell us what she bought from the store.

And then the attitude started. The attitude that told us that not all was well. The attitude that prompted me to inform her that I was going to talk to her teacher....which was met with a very worried look and a quick "You can't!" I could and I did.

And what I found out was enough to make me want to crawl in a hole.

Not only had she been losing every single fish every single day for nearly two weeks, but she had developed a nasty habit of talking back to her teacher. The teacher would tell her recess was over, stop the swing...and she would say "No. I don't want to." The teacher would ask her to stop running in the hall and she would respond by smirking and running faster.

No wonder we were seeing an attitude. I think it could be called the Attitude of Guilt. She wasn't able to go to sleep well at night. She simply wasn't coping well with the lies she had been telling us.

Following my little chat with the teacher, her attitude shifted. She was devastated that we had found out the truth, but I think she slept better that night than she had for weeks.

She still lost every fish for several days cause bad habits are difficult to break, but now? Several weeks later? She keeps nearly every fish every day. :)

She's trying. She still struggles to keep herself under control...too much energy to sit still for that long...but she's getting there!

Her mornings go so much better now. She bounds out of bed and comes down dressed and ready to go. She chows her breakfast. Typically. She flies around getting herself ready and usually is standing by the door ready and waiting, chomping at the bit.

This week Jason has been dropping her off. Her attitude has dissolved but in it's place has come a...I don't know the word.

Yesterday when Jason was hauling her down the road in the pickup, she says...

Daddy...
What?
You don't have to get out and open the door for me this morning.
Why not?
Well, one time when Mommy brought me to school she let me go by myself and I could open it myself.
Oh. What if I want to open the door for you?
Well, Daddy. You have your boots on.
?
Daddy. It's embarrassing when you wear your boots into school.

You've got to be kidding me. When Jason told me that she was embarrassed to have him take her in because he was wearing boots, I nearly croaked. We seriously have to start the be-embarrassed-of-your-parents thing already? I thought we'd surely have a few more years before that set in.

And so go her days. She marches in that door like she owns the place. She's re-learning her letters. She's learning to respect authority. She's learning the days of the week and the months of the year and how to count to 100 and personal boundaries and how to control her emotions and....

Overall, I think kindergarten was the best choice for her. Sure, she's with girls nearly two years younger than she is, but she stays many afternoons to be with the children her age. And that, too, has been good for her. While she can get away with being queen of the classroom in kindergarten, she can't get by with it when she goes into the 1st to 6th grade classroom. She's slowly learning that big kids don't bow down to the whims of a six year old.

This year has been good. For the most part.

She's loving school and all that goes with it.

She's becoming a young lady before my eyes. Since she's only been in our family for three and a half years, I tend to think that she should be 3 1/2. She's not. And she'll let you know if you try to treat her that way.

Christmas Already?

It's that time of year. Family Christmas's have begun.

Perhaps I should call it a reunion...but really? I don't like the sound of that. Reunion makes it sound like we're all old people getting together to hash out our children.

I'm going to stick with Christmas.

This year our Christmas's are spread out. One already in the past, the next one the first weekend of December, the next one the third weekend of December, the next one the first Sunday in January, and one final hurrah....a whole week in Florida come February!

They're always tons of fun. Most of us spend the night both Friday and Saturday nights. In fact, we only have one Christmas gathering that is for just one day. It makes it seem so special to spend the whole weekend with family.

And this family that I was just with this past weekend is no small family.

It all started out back in 1952 when Grandpa and Grandma tied the knot.

Just 13 or so years later they had six children.

Just 46 years later, here is what we have.

And this. Minus one cousin and his wife who live in Oregon and the husband of one of the cousins and a cousin who vacated the picture to go rescue his screeching son.

And this. Minus the five or so babies who were sleeping and the cousin- from-Oregon's daughter.

In all I think there are nearly 80 of us...and already we know of four more babies joining the family sometime next year. One in January, one in March (?), and a set of twins in May (my brother and his wife)!

The family is growing by leaps and bounds.

Our children LOVE the Stull Christmas. And all the others for that matter.

There's a huge snack table. There's oodles of children to race around with. There's later bedtimes (not so smart) and little napping.

And that all results in huge attitudes the next few days, but we'll not talk about that right now.

It all makes me so thankful. Thankful that God placed me in a family that knows and loves Jesus. Thankful that my grandparents and parents passed on their knowledge of Jesus. Thankful that a group of 80 family members can spend an entire weekend together and enjoy every minute of it.

Orphans at Play Christmas Fundraiser

Big things are happening at Orphans at Play!! On my end of things we've now shipped out six suitcases heavy laden with coats, jackets, hats, snowpants, scarves, mittens, and nice warm pajamas!!! It's been so fun to imagine the happy grins on the faces of the children at the other end.

Makes me want to hop on a plane with the seven suitcases sitting here and take them over myself. But, alas. I don't think that's gonna happen anytime soon.

The Grandma Mentoring Program is a big push right now. We have goals for 2012 that won't be met without the help of folks around the world.

The main goal right now is to raise enough money to be able to put four full time grandmas into orphanages for an entire year. We need $5000. From now through November 21, we will be taking orders for keychains and necklaces.

I have a keychain and Addie has a necklace...and we plan to order more! They are super quality. I can hardly wait to place another order.

Each keychain and/or necklace is $15. Below is a brochure with all the options that are currently available.

If you care to order one or ten, you can either place your order at Orphans at Play or you can let me know what you want, send me a check, and I'll get it to you when the time comes!! Your choice.

If you choose to order through me, you can send me an e-mail at jody@orphansatplay.org, or you can simply leave a comment below. Just let me know the number of the one you choose and send me a check.

Thank you all in advance!!!

Answered Prayer

Do you remember way back in January when we posted a very sad post? The post that stated that "It (court) didn't go as we had hoped. After a slew of questions fired at us and the social worker, we were asked to step into the hall while they discussed the case. That part wasn't so unusual.
The unusual part was the final verdict. Court has been postponed until Friday, January 21 at 11:00 in the morning."

Oh, the memories those few sentences bring back to me. What a difficult time that was for us.

But we had the prayers of thousands on our side. And even better. We had God.

A month or so ago we had a searcher find Jack's birth family for us. What a blessing it is for us to know information about his family. To have pictures. To let them know that their son is being cared for.

I don't plan to share much information about the search. We feel that it is our children's story and just as you wouldn't spill everything out to a perfect stranger (or even an acquaintance) we don't plan to spill our children's stories. They know their stories. We talk about their Russian families frequently...but if they want everyone to know all the nitty gritty details, they will be the ones to share.

Anyway.

I am going to share just a few details of Jack's story....cause it involves every single one of you who prayed for us during those four very difficult days back in January. January 17 - January 20, 2011.

Without going into too much detail, our court for Jack was a little rocky because of an older brother who hadn't been located and therefore hadn't signed the proper release document.

Legally, any living relative has to sign a release document before a child can be adopted from Russia. At least that's the way I understand it. Jack's mom signed off, but his older brother (24 years old) was never found and therefore couldn't sign off.

The social worker supposedly tried as hard as she could to find him, but noone had seen him for three years.

The judge and prosecutor weren't happy with that answer. Court was postponed so the social worker could go find that brother. For several days, she visited as many people as she could trying to find him.

He was never found.

The judge and prosecutor weren't exactly happy with the results of the search, but they okayed the adoption anyway. Obviously.

Finding Jack's birth mom told us that this was indeed a spiritual battle.

We found out that the brother is indeed still alive. He's in the military and was simply out on duty during that time.

Turns out, he was rather upset with his mother for leaving her son in an orphanage. He thought she should go get him. He hadn't talked to her for months because she wouldn't go pick Jack up.

That's so hard for me to comprehend. A mother not desiring to pick up her son from an orphanage.

But I have to remember that life is so difficult over there. Here in America we think we have our struggles...but we simply cannot comprehend the struggles of folks in other countries.

Long story short....had the older brother been found, he would not have signed the release document, and we would not have Jack in our family right now.

Wow.

This boy of ours? God must have some big plans for him. Plans big enough that He wanted him out of that baby home.

And so, I thank you again. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you so much for praying.

While we prayed that God would allow us to accept whatever fork the road may take, He graciously allowed us the desire of our hearts. Another son.

I know that God always, ALWAYS answers prayer...sometimes with yes, sometimes with no, sometimes with wait...this time He answered us with an absolute YES.

Jack became our son. Now all we can do is raise him for the glory of God.

A part of me can't help but feel a little....guilty, I guess. While we thoroughly enjoy having this little blond haired tornado in our home, she sits on the other side of the world wondering how he's doing. We laugh at his giggles, she wonders what his voice sounds like. We listen to him learning to talk..."Gook, Mama!"...she listens to the silence.

It's the same with all of our children. I'm beyond thankful that adoption is an option, but I can't help but wonder why God allowed them to not be raised in the family to which they were born. I feel so very inadequate to have been chosen to raise three little souls from the other side of the world.

And I can only pray that they can overlook my downfalls and learn to love Jesus with their whole being.

Real Life

We had a huge weekend. It was our fellowship's communion weekend which means that we had church for roughly seven hours Saturday and two hours Sunday. They did super in church! I have to admit that that much sitting is tough for me....and I'm always amazed that children can sit for that long without going completely crazy.

Til Sunday afternoon though, it was time to be home. Time to return to just our little family of five. Time to relax. Time to nap. Time to run and play.

I used to laugh at people who said their children got 'over-stimulated'. Seriously? Over-stimulated? What a cop-out.

No laughing any more. Not even a chuckle. Or a grin.

We have a child (or maybe three of them) who fits the 'over-stimulation' term to a T. She does great until we have an abundance of social time....or 'plans' as she says.

A weekend like we had this weekend nearly does her in. She loses all track of who she is and how she's supposed to act. To the point of walking up to a little girl and pushing her down for aparently no reason whatsoever.

It's hard for me as her parent to watch. It's tough to know that there's junk inside her that she simply can't talk about. It's difficult to know that the three years before she came to live at our house were far more difficult than any of my 29 years have ever been.

But the hardest thing of all is knowing how to deal with it. We don't do 'time-outs' with our children. It simply re-inforces what they already believe about themselves..."I am too bad to be included in this family. They shove me off by myself cause they can't handle me...just like my first family couldn't handle me."

It breaks my heart.

How sad is it to know that our children (meaning many adopted children and some biological) can truly believe that?

We do lots of time-ins around here. Rather than sending them to their rooms for a while, we hold them....or we sit them on a chair right beside us....or they just join us in whatever we are doing.

Raising children looks a lot different to me now than it used to. :)

It always seemed so cut and dried. Ha ha. And then we had children.

And our children came as walking, talking little people. Little people who had endured more hurt than any person should. Little people who take a different kind of parenting. Little people whom we had to teach how to love and how to become a part of a family. Little people who have a past...on top of all 'normal' child issues.

It hits us more and more just how huge of a responsiblity we have. Not only do we need to help them walk through past hurts, but we also need to help them deal with the 'normal' stuff.

Whew.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not complaining. God has blessed us with adoption for a reason.

On rough days like yesterday we tend to let Satan work with our minds...God didn't allow us biological children cause he knew we couldn't handle being parents.

So not true.

God didn't allow us biological children because He knew that we needed the blessing of adoption. He, for some odd reason, knew that we needed the challenge of raising children with a past.

It's hard. Just as all parenting is.

For instance, did you know that if a child is on too many antiobiotics for too long (Addie was on quite a few antibiotics for ear infections and Will was on four different ones in six months time to try to take care of a boil..and they didn't work), it can kill all good bacteria in the intestines, which in turn causes digestion issues, which causes a lack of saratonin, which causes a sad supply of melatonin, which causes a lack of sleep because the melatonin isn't present, which causes depression and horrid behavior? I didn't either.

Until Friday, when we talked with the therapist. Another thing that I never dreamed we would be doing. Talking to a therapist to find out how to best help our children.

So now, on top of all the other strange ideas we have, we're adding in 30 minutes of massage per day with our children...which equates one and a half hours. :) Good thing we don't have twelve children. :) That should help with the depression.

We're waiting on a mother starter so we can make kefir to build up the good bacteria in the intestines. We're shoveling them full of fish oil. We're having glasses of warm milk before going to bed....brushing our teeth afterwards, of course, so as to not promote cavities.

And we're praying. Mightily. Praying that our behavior issues of the past year can be toned down if we can just get the balance in the gut better and they can begin to get the amount of sleep that children need to function.

We wonder why God has called us to walk this path. We struggle with being the parents that our children so desperately need. We cry and we pray and we rest up for the next day.

And yet, when it comes right down to it, we know why God has called us to this path. We know that if we had had biological children, if we would have just sailed through life dealing with 'normal' family building methods, we maybe wouldn't have been tested as we have been. We maybe wouldn't have had the opportunity to learn to trust God as completely as we're learning that now.

We likely could have used the parenting styles that we thought we would. We likely could have sailed through life with well adjusted, well- socialized children. (Is well-socialized a word?!)

Some days I struggle with not being a 'normal' family.

But in the end, I know that God called us here for a purpose. God knew from the beginning that we wouldn't build our family through 'normal' methods. God has a plan.

And I must trust that HE knows what is best for us. 'Normal' or not.

:)

Dear Anna~

It's that time of year again. The little boy that you brought into the world is turning five today. Five.

I know. I can hardly believe it either.

There's not much I can tell you that you don't already know. Just a few weeks ago you received some new pictures of him.

You found out that he is the most stubborn child that I have ever met...

But also one of the sweetest. Depends on his mood. And the amount of sleep he has gotten.

He's a rough and tumble boy who will outclimb every child around.

He's chock full of laughter.

He's finally a loving big brother. He kind of struggled giving up his baby-of-the-family status there for six months or so. Now? He begs to have Jack come out and play. I think that's mainly to teach him all the tricks of being a boy....the things that tend to give a mommy gray hair.

No picture...but imagine in your mind going outside and finding your two and four year old boys crawling around on top of the camper. It's taller than I am. Granted, some may call me short...somewhere between 5'2" and 5'3"...but I tend to think the top of the camper should be off limits.

That's the kind of gray hair activities that I'm talking about.

He's a fun little boy. He's all boy.

He loves to pray at meal time and trust me, he covers all the bases. Every last one of them. Not too long ago he was praying away...praying for all his usuals....the children in of'nages, his family in Russia, the children who don't have toys, the peoples who don't have houses, the children who don't have food (cause we like food) and then he threw in one that we had never heard before and have never heard since.

He prayed that all the old people will have food..."like Grandpa Miller," he said, "cause I think that Grandpa gets hungry sometimes." It was hard to stifle the laughter on that one!

He loves life!

We pray that somehow, someway, you know that we love him. That you know that he loves his Russia Mama Anna. That you know that we are raising him to be a warrior for Jesus.

We love you, Anna~

Weary

It's 12:34AM. I should be in bed.

Instead, I'm trying to stay awake while waiting on Jason to get home from the field....and word is that it's gonna be a while yet....so I may have to give in.

In fact? It'd be wise if I have any desire to be a cheerful mother tomorrow.

Or, I could always call mom and drop them off for the day as I did today. But today I had a reason. For real. I had an appointment that was not child friendly, and as a result I had nearly six hours all to myself. Something that hasn't happened for 3 years, four months, and five days.

It was lovely. I missed them, of course, but I have to admit that listening to the silence while driving down the road was so...peaceful. Our typical car rides are anything but peaceful. Picture a four door car with two adults in the front and three children six and under in the back. Picture a pesky two year old in the middle. Picture the four (nearly five) year old on the right and the six year old on the left. Picture what would happen if the four (nearly five) year old decided that he wanted the book that the six year old had.

Got that? That's our typical car rides.

Today? Not a stitch of noise. I basked in it, but was very thankful to have them all back in their proper seats. Back to normal. The brief getaway was nice, but it showed me that the noise is better.

But that's not what I logged in to say. I don't even know what took me there.

Life has been busy. Will turns five on Saturday...but we have plans that entire day. Plus, with Jason in the field we can't really plan on having his little party until it rains...so we cheated a little and had his birthday party this past Sunday. Which confused him greatly. If we were having his party, then surely he must be five now?!

Addie begged to wrap the gift. I obliged and sacrificed nearly a whole roll of tape as she wanted to insure that he could not peek.

Will was delighted to have yet another backhoe cake. Hoping that til next year he's on to something other than backhoes, trackhoes, and dump trucks. :)

He was, of course, ecstatic!! As the pictures show...

Jack was thrilled to have a new box to play in.

Changing the subject:
Last night Jason called me from the field and told me to get outside. Seemed odd, but I listened and I was so glad that I did.

Northern Lights. Aurora Borealis, if I remember correctly. If not, chalk it up to late night rambling...as this whole post seems to be. :)

Six years of having a 'decent' camera and still I haven't taken the time to learn how to take good after-dark pictures.

If that doesn't show the Greatness of God, please show me something that does. It's nothing but God's Hand that could make big clouds of red and green to fill up the night sky.

Changing the subject again:
Before I forget, thank you all so much for the advice on the sleeping issues at our house. We have implemented a few of them.... Fans running in bedrooms all night long, very dim nightlight to ward off the elephants lurking in the hallway, as much fish oil as a child can take....

No king sized bed as it wouldn't allow us to open the door to our bedroom...but thanks, Brenda, for the suggestion.

Pause. Speaking of sleep issues, I have a child awake and crying. :) Perhaps he'll drift back off without seeing me this time.

Back again. All is well.

And again:
We can fund one grandma for three months or three grandmas for one month or two grandmas for 1.7 months. Whatever way you want to look at it.

And now. It's 1:10AM. I must head to bed.

Someone has to get up in a mere six hours to get a little girl ready for school. Someone has to fix breakfast and take that little girl down the road. Someone has to have a smile on her face when that alarm rings in six hours.

It is time. I'm sorry to subject you to the rambles.

Jackets - n - Hats Drive Update

WOW.

That's all I have to say about the amazing amounts of coats/jackets/hats/scarves/mittens that we have received for the orphans in Vladivostok, Russia.

If you could see my upstairs bathroom right now, you would agree. The bathtub is full and over-flowing, the toilet is barely visible. We can hardly open the door and good luck to me if I want to get into the attic. :) I took a picture so you could enjoy it with me.

Thankfully, this bathroom is not usable. At all. As in, the water is not hooked up and hasn't been since the great flood last January. The children don't really enjoy coming downstairs to use the toilet in the middle of the night, but we don't really enjoy the thought of re-doing the whole downstairs again. Okay. We didn't actually re-do it ourselves, but the headache of trying to 'oversee' it from across the world isn't something that we relish.

I think we're winning. At this point.

The point is, we've collected a mountain of items to send overseas. And I'm not the only one collecting. There's Autumn in California, Melissa in Arkansas, Meredith in Northern Ohio, Sabrina in Florida, Shona in New Zealand :), Kathy in Tennessee, Lilian near Washington, D.C., Christen in Chicago, Kristy here in my area, and a few others around here.

I can't imagine how many we'd have if we piled them all in one gigantic pile. It'd be huge...and it's all thanks to the many willing hearts who chose to help us out.

SO. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU.

That sounds a little lame when I consider all the children on the other side of the world who will be on the receiving end. I can only imagine the ecstatic grins on their faces. The joy they will have in receiving an item as trivial as a coat or a hat. But it will be real.

It makes me wonder why my children aren't so ecstatic when they receive a new hat or jacket. Oh sure. They're happy that they got it instead of their brother or sister getting it, but they quickly forget the joy.

It makes me want to clean out closets. Clean out extra jackets. Clean out the multitude of socks. Something to make them thrilled to peices with the new pair of shoes we shopped for.

And there's no reason why I couldn't do that. No reason other than the fact that it's nice to have a little variety in the closet.

But it does make me stop and think. In the culture of America it's far too easy to take for granted the abundance of stuff that we have access to. In Russia? You can't even buy peanut butter. Seriously. We did find a tiny little jar in Moscow, but it cost about $13 if I remember correctly. We didn't buy it. (My children wouldn't mind, though, if we couldn't buy peanut butter...not a one of them likes it.)

Anyway. Thank you so very much for trusting us to get those coats and miscellaneous items to Vladivostok. We're working on it.

The first suitcase went over the beginning of October with Kyle and Ashley (The Fischbach's)(who, by the way, could use your prayers right now. I can't go into detail, but suffice it to say that the first few weeks after adopting two children can get a little hairy..and they've had some added dimensions. I know that they would deeply appreciate your prayers...) I packed it up....

...and delivered it to Ashley at her house as they don't live too far from us.

The second suitcase was packed and shipped UPS to Minnesota today!!!

Included in these two suitcases was....17 toddler coats, 25 toddler jackets, 41 toddler hats, 5 toddler mittens, 2 toddler snow pants, and 80 tubes of diaper rash cream!!! That basically cleaned out my toddler supply of coats, etc. but the mountain of size 5-size for 17 year olds is still looming large!! The next ones out will be packed for the older children in more remote locations.

What a blessing you all have been to the orphans.

James 1:27...."Pure and lasting religion in the sight of God our Father means that we must care for orphans and widows in their troubles, and refuse to le tthe world corrupt us."

Give a Grandma

A while back I mentioned a program that we are pushing at Orphans at Play. It's a program that is very near and dear to my heart....and also to the hearts of quite a few who have been to orphanages in Russia.

The program involves folks who are interested in giving to children left behind. Children who have no family to come see them. Children who for various reasons have not been adopted. Children who are used to living with 20 other children...and are used to not having parents. No family. No-one to teach them the ins and outs of life. No one to prepare them for the time when it's time to spread their wings. No one.

The Give-a-Mentor program will help alleviate some of those issues. Some of them. It doesn't give a child the family that they so desperately want and need. It doesn't give them the cooking skills or the grocery buying skills or the job getting skills. It doesn't give them the day to day love and hugs that children (and all ages, actually) so desperately need.

But. It does give them interaction with 'grandmas' or young people who want to give of themselves to these children. It does give them the opportunity to know that one person in the big ole world cares enough about them to come visit. It does give them some brief contacts with love. It does let them know that life is not all about just getting from one moment to the next.

It gives them hope. Hope for the future.

It gives them a little stability. It gives them a chance to attach to one person in their life....which is such a blessing when they are adopted. If a child has the ability to attach to just one person, that child will (someday) be able to attach to their new family.

It gives them touch, which is so important for a child's development.

Overall, the program is a wonderful way to help the orphans who are left behind. Orphans at Play has partnered with Vlad Mission (If you go to the Vlad Mission website, you'll notice that it is a Catholic organization. I'm not a Catholic, nor do I agree with all the Catholics believe, but I do believe that what they are doing in Vlad is wonderful.)in order to get 8 grandmas into orphanages full time....meaning they have to spend 48 hours per month at the orphanage spending time with the children.

So. There are a couple ways that you can help us get these mentors in to the children's lives. ONE: go to the OAP website and click on the 'donate' button at the top of the page. You can designate in the comment box as to where you want the money to go. Just as an item of interest...it costs $60 to get one grandma into the orphanage for one month. Any amount donated would be greatly appreciated. TWO: We'll be unveiling a new program here in the next few weeks just in time for Christmas...so stay tuned. :) Oh, and by the way? Anytime you donate to OAP, it's tax deductible. Not that that should be an incentive, but if you claim it on your taxes...in the long run you'll be able to give more to more places...just because you saved that much in tax money. Or something like that.

I have to admit that I'm not a financial guru.

While this is obviously where our hearts are...the orphans in Russia...I know that not everyone else's hearts are at that same spot. And I'm so thankful for that. If we all were concentrating on Russia, what about Ethiopia or Liberia or Uganda or India or Chile or Brazil or Mexico or here in the States? God in His wisdom has allowed us to think for ourselves and has given us the hearts for different locations around the globe. He knows that there are children (and adults) everywhere who need folks to love them from afar. The main point is that we need to be aware. We need to do what we can to help who we can.

Sometimes we get so caught up in ourselves (talking to myself here) that we tend to forget that there are others out there who have it way worse than we do.

But. There's what's happening with the organization that I am involved with. If you care to help us get the mentors into the orphanages, we'd be thrilled to have your help!!

God bless you all...

Call Out To Parents

We need some help. Really.

We have three children (didja know that?!), all adopted, all with sleep issues.

It's not fun.

Well. Perhaps I should clarify on that statment. The children are fun. Most of the time. The adoption part is fun, once you have them home. The sleep issues are NOT FUN.

Is it only our family that deals with this? Is it only our children who don't sleep? At least not for very long snatches at a time?

Allow me to explain. Way back in 2008 when we brought home Addie and Will, neither of them enjoyed going to sleep. We would sit by their beds for hours, literally, waiting on them to drift off. If we left, they screamed. Bedtime came at 8:00 and on a good night both would be snoring about 11:00.

(September, 2008)

Will did better than Addie, but was still able to keep himself awake for a couple hours before he would finally drift off.

Addie finally slept in our bed with us for about six months and that did help her sleep issues....but I'll have to admit that it did nothing for my sleep. :)

Three years later and we still don't sleep well. The children that is. Some nights they'll go to sleep in three minutes flat. No, I don't sit by their beds to find that out, but all noise ceases about then. Some nights they'll be awake for two hours before finally drifting off.

(April, 2009)

It's not that they get too much sleep otherwise. The only napper in our house these days is Jack...and his naps last a maximum of 1 hour. One per day.

Addie will generally sleep decently unless there is something bothering her...which here lately is every night. She's still a little scared to go to sleep cause that elephant might get her. ?!

Will is hit and miss. Last night he actually went to sleep fairly quickly and as far as I know he slept all night. At least if he got up during the night he hit his feet on the floor quietly. It's not the least bit uncommon for him to stay awake until nearly 11:00. If he does happen to drift off before 11:00, it's not unusual to hear his feet hit the floor about 2:00AM...and then to hear the lego drawers opening. Seriously. His room is pitch black. Not even a nightlight. Why would you have a desire to play with legos in the dark? If he's not out of bed playing with legos, it's not too long til we hear talking (to himself) or the picture above his bed hitting the floor because he laid on his back and started tapping the picture with his feet or the bed squeaking around cause he's jumping on the bed, or .......

(April, 2010)

Jack slept well for a while. Kind of. Here lately sleep is over-rated, aparently. He'll typically go to sleep within minutes of his head hitting the pillow (about 8:00) but will proceed to wake up crying 6-8 times nearly every night. And he won't be quiet til I touch him. Sure, that sounds cute and all, but at 2:00 and 3:15 and 4:14 and 5:34 and 6:12 it really isn't overly adorable. He hasn't slept with us for over a month, but is still sleeping in our bedroom. Several nights last week he actually crawled out of his bed and into ours....where he snuggled right in and started snoring. Makes me wonder if he shouldn't be back in our bed, but really? It's not something that I enjoy...sharing my bed with a toddler.

So tell me. Is it just our family? Is it something that we are doing that is causing the no sleep epedemic? Is it a normal child thing to not sleep?

What do you do for sleeping problems? Is there a quick fix or is it something that will eventually take care of itself?

Before we're advised to get a bedtime routine in place, we have one. Supper (that'd be dinner to all you who aren't country bumpkins) is at 6:00. Most evenings all three children have been showered and readied for bed before 6:00 rolls around. After supper, they sit on the couch and read books quietly until the adults of the house are ready to have devotions. Many evenings I'll read them a couple stories before we tuck them in. It's quiet around here in the evenings. They are typically drowsy and seem more than ready to hit the pillow. Until they actually hit the pillow.

Something about their pillows maybe?!

(February, 2011)

I wouldn't be too concerned about it if it weren't for the actions that go along with not quite enough sleep. Addie tends to get out of control hyper. Will cries over every little thing. Jack grouches and whines.

And so go our weeks. :) Two good sleeps and three no-sleep-at-alls.

Any advice? Any ideas? Any experience with this? Any thoughts even with no experience?

We're open. And ready to have three children who sleep. :)

(September, 2011)