Grab a Cup of Coffee

For the past couple weeks I've been thinking that I should do a quick update. You know, just a little bit of news from the chaotic household that we call our family.

It hasn't happened.

Somehow the days are seeming to run into each other and before I know it another week has disappeared. And more news has stacked up. Which means that it's likely to be a LONG update rather than a quick one.

Sorry about that.

Life is moving on.

We're still receiving meals three times a week from our wonderful church family. Seriously. Ty is now a little over six weeks old and we're still getting ready to eat meals every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I feel beyond spoiled. I'm a little embarrassed. There are so many people who need it far worse than we do....but I have to admit that it has been very, very nice. But no matter how nice it has been, I do still feel a little odd about it. Thank you, thank you, thank you to the many who have blessed us in this way.

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School started. Hallelujah. Sometimes I start to feel a tad guilty about being so happy to see my children heading off to school three mornings a week, but then reality strikes again. I tried that home-schooling thing. And I greatly disliked it. Greatly. My children would hate me and I'd likely hate them if I were to try it again. It helps that we love the school they are attending. A small Christian school that is walking distance from our house. When you consider the fact we live in the country and there aren't an abundance of houses around, I consider it somewhat of a miracle to have a school that we like within walking distance.

Addie started school the day after Labor Day. (Will was supposed to, but we'll touch that later. :) ) She LOVES it. Except for the fact that she can't talk non-stop all day as she got used to doing over the summer. She's paying for that fact tomorrow. First break for her will be spent sitting on the sidelines while her classmates run around. Oops. Her teacher told her that warnings are over. She also struggles with serious nosiness issues...and that is causing a few minor problems...but overall it's going much, much better than it did last year. Maybe it's just cause it's first grade...cause our kindergartner is struggling. :)

I had no idea that kindergarten could be so stressful.

Will started school the day after it officially started. We had made the mistake of telling him that if he wasn't 'strong' when school started he wouldn't be able to go. Things were going decently well with him until we got to about the one week countdown before school started.

Then he ramped things up. Bigtime.

We didn't know if we would send him to school or not until Labor Day.

He made a mistake. A big one. He informed me that he couldn't go to school unless he was strong. We discussed that a little bit, and it finally came out that he was scared to go to school. In other words, he figured out that if he acted weak (threw fits, refused to do his jobs, etc.) that he would not have to go to school...which he deemed scary.

Works in theory, but we quickly vetoed that plan.

He went to school. And, bad mom that I am, I forgot to take the camera with me. Maybe one of these days I'll remember it....

After his first day, I asked him how he liked it. His words? "School is a DRAG. My teacher makes me listen, too."

Yay for awesome teachers!!!

The second day he did okay. Caused a few issues with another little fella in his class, but nothing too serious.

The third day was fair.

The fourth day. Today. Oh my. His true colors are showing. He respectfully refused to do his school work.

At least he was respectful about it. :)

He colored on his desk rather than in his book. He didn't want to trace the circles. He did nothing....rather than doing his work.

So. It came home with him. Who ever heard of a kindergartner having lots of homework?!

I dreaded our afternoon and evening. It really wasn't too bad. He sat at the table for about three hours coloring and taking swigs of the fish oil that was sitting in front of him. Yum. Is too much fish oil a bad thing?! I don't really know how much he drank before I caught him, but he appears to be acting normal, so I guess I won't be too worried.

Anyway. For three hours he sat and colored and traced circles. I knew right where he was. Pretty easy. :)

Amazingly enough, he did get all the work done and I was able to sign his homework slip.

So that's how school is going for him. There is definitely room for improvement. :)

(Not too many pictures of Will right now. It's hard to snap photos of a child who seems to have a constant frown on his face.)

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Jack is in fine three old form. He bucks nearly every request...part of it is normal toddler stuff and the rest is a direct result of watching is idol (Will) flop around much of the day. It's hard to know what to do. When Will flops around we ignore him. He figures out on his own that it's not getting him anywhere.

Is Jack old enough to logically figure that out? I really think he is, but then start feeling bad because he's really just a product of his environment. Sad.

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Ty is doing great. He's growing like a weed and I would guess him to be around 12 pounds. Not such a tiny baby anymore.

He's still keeping me up late many nights and waking once to eat, but he's such a happy little guy that I really can't complain.

Sleep is overrated. :)

A typical night he's finally in bed about 11:00-12:00, up at 2:30-3:00 to eat, and up again about 5:30-6:00. He's usually awake much of the morning, takes a nice long nap in the afternoon and up for the evening.

He's really developed a liking to a pacifier, which is absolutely lovely. I really would prefer that he suck his thumb, but at least the paci has stopped the fussy evenings. And nights.

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Harvest started tonight. Jason is often home to pick up his supper which is great considering that means I don't have to pack supper and four children in the van and head off to the field.

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And now on to the topic that has been occupying my mind quite a bit in the past six weeks. Until we went to Colorado, I had no idea just how much a baby is impacted for the rest of his/her life while still in the womb. No clue.

Since Ty was born, I've compared him with our other three probably more than I should, but it's made me more compassionate for them.

For example. You know how babies of mothers who smoke are often smaller? There's a reason. Sometime back researchers inserted a camera into a mothers tummy to see what happens to the baby when the mom smokes.

The baby knew even when the mom THOUGHT about getting a cigarette out. Just the thought. Wow.

But when the mom actually lit up? The baby would tighten the muscles around the umbilical cord and curl up as tightly as possible in an attempt to keep the nicotine from entering his/her body. The camera showed the baby's face all screwed up as if he/she was in severe pain.

Babies of mothers who smoke learn in the womb to protect themselves.

Alcohol does serious damage too, as we all know. A baby born to a mom who drinks will have a brain that resembles swiss cheese. Of course, the more that is consumed the greater the damage on the baby.

We know that at least one of our children's birth-moms smoked. And at least one of them drank.

Our children were taught from before birth that they would have to take care of themselves. Then they were placed in an orphanage...two at birth and one a year after birth after severe neglect...where they were taught even more to fend for themselves.

Is it any wonder that they have some struggles? Is it any wonder that it is so hard for them to believe that we are here to stay? Is it any wonder that they are so extremely independent?

If I could just remember that when I am frustrated...

Our children are 'normal' children with lots of extra baggage. They are 'normal' children with histories that I cannot even fathom. They are 'normal' children attempting to work through issues that I as a thirty year old adult had never really considered until they joined our family four years ago.

It's hard for me now to put Ty down, even to take a nap. I lay him in his crib to sleep and feel like I'm acting like an orphanage caregiver. I put him in his bouncy seat and struggle walking away from him for fear that he may feel abandoned. He rides in the Ergo much of the day and sleeps in a bed right beside ours all night.

I don't call him spoiled, I call him cared for and well loved. Two things that none of our other children experienced until they were 3 1/2, 21 months, and 17 months. What a sad world we live in.

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I forgot. Jack celebrated his third birthday way back in August. He didn't even know it was his birthday until the morning of, and even then it was severely downplayed this year. Not on purpose. Life got in the way. Thankfully, I had remembered it for a split second while in town the week before so he did get a small gift.

No exciting decorated cake, though. I had good intentions, but they just didn't pan out. Instead we made a special trip to Dairy Queen and purchased a most delicious ice cream cake.

Thankfully he didn't remember his birthday from last year and the lack of planning didn't seem to affect him too much. :)

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And one final thing. Addie and Will have completed their second week of therapeutic horseback riding. I don't know how or if it'll work, but supposedly riding a horse is super therapy for a child/adult with emotional setbacks. For the next eight weeks, every Tuesday night we'll be watching them ride a horse.

Addie is on Clay.

Will is on Tommy Girl.

Both of them love it. Dearly.

We fear that someday we'll have to buy a horse.

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The end. Our lives are now up to date in the blog world. Except I just remembered that we went camping (for one night) over Labor Day weekend. I'll spare you the details.

I'm too tired to type any more...and Ty will be screeching for his bedtime snack anytime now.